12 Rules for Life:
An Antidote to Chaos
About Author
Jordan Peterson is a clinical psychologist and professor of
psychology at the University of Toronto. He went viral after he supposedly
criticised legislation in Canada regarding the use of transgender pronouns.
Although he's got a bunch of social justice warriors chasing him with
pitchforks, millions have been inspired by his enthusiasm and unique outlook on
life. His most recent book, " Twelve Rules For Life", quickly became
the number one bestselling book on Amazon this year.
Summary of Book
Here I will draw on stories from both my life and Peterson's
to illustrate the rules that are discussed in this book. This book is such an
entertaining self help guide for young people that lays out simple principles
which are beneficial to be more disciplined, behave better, act better and
enjoy our life as much as we can.
Rule #1 Stand straight
with your shoulders back:
It will change how you and other people perceive you on a neural level. You'll be more likely to attract a mate, find it easier to pay attention to subtle social cues, and be treated by people differently. You will have more confidence and fill your brain with healthy levels of serotonin. On the contrary, a slumpy posture will render you more likely to abuse drugs, you will have less zest for life and you increase the likelihood of getting heart disease, cancer, and dementia.
Rule #2 Treat
yourself like someone you are responsible for helping:
Take this scenario, sick people are prescribed a drug. One
third won't fill the prescription and the rest will fill it, but will take it
incorrectly. Now, imagine it's not you who are sick, but your dog, Scruffy. You
take Scruffy to the vet, and the vet gives you a prescription. What's bizarre
here is that most of you have every reason to distrust a vet as much as you do
a doctor, yet you are fulfilling a prescription for your pet. It seems we take
more care for our pets than ourselves. Ultimately, what I got from Peterson was
to establish your values in the direction you are heading in order to treat
yourself like someone you are responsible for helping. This can be difficult,
but it is ten times better to have a rough idea of your values and direction
than nothing at all.
Rule #3 Make friends
with people who want the best for you:
Most people have loser friends. Let's be real. Friends they
just hang out with because they're roommates, they went to school together, or
they enjoy smoking weed. Does this sound like you? If so, it's time to do an
audit. Who in your friendship circle is actually pushing you to be a better
person? Who makes you smile when you are around them? If none of your friends
fit these criteria, you should seriously reconsider who you are hanging around.
Rule #4 is Compare
yourself to who you were yesterday, not to who someone else is today:
Let suppose a situation my ex-girlfriend and I both had
YouTube channels. We were both putting tremendous of into our channels, but
hers just wouldn't grow, but mine would. She'd always say she was proud of me, but
then follow it up with a dim face, telling me how jealous she was of my
success. You've probably found yourself in a similar situation. This would go
on and on. And till this day, she remains where she is and I say this at the
risk of sounding like a condescending twat. But the reality is, if she
continues to compare herself to others, she will continually be frustrated. What
I found helps is just realizing that there will always be someone doing better
than you. So why on Earth would you waste your time comparing yourself?
Rule #5 Do not let
your children do anything that makes you dislike them:
Peterson outlines parenting rules in this chapter, but, to
be honest, I was more interested in the discussion about whether you should hit
your misbehaving child. Picture this, you walk into your living room and see little
boy Jimmy prodding a fork into the electrical socket. You shout, "Jimmy,
stop that!" He doesn't stop. "Jimmy, stop that right now." He
doesn't stop. So what do you do? Well, the answer is simple according to
Peterson, whatever will stop it fastest, within reason. Because the alternative
could be fatal, in this scenario, a slap in the face may be justified, if
that's what it takes. What do you think? Comment your thoughts below.
Rule #6 Set your
house in perfect order before you criticise the world:
Nihilism, you know, the belief that everything is
fundamentally meaningless. One of my friend struggled immensely with this last
year, to the point of stuffing himself with seven Mars bars a day and abusing
an opiate-like substance called kratom. He saw absolutely no reason for his
youtube channel to exist, let alone for himself and the world to exist. It was
too much to bear. But thankfully, he made it out. And now he see the six months
of existential anguish as one of the best things that has ever happened to him.
So before we criticise the world, Peterson
suggests you start to stop doing what you know to be wrong.
Rule #7 Pursue what
is meaningful, not what is expedient:
Pursue pleasure, lie, cheat, steal, deceive, manipulate, but
don't get caught. In an ultimately meaningless universe, what possible
difference could it make? That's what it means to be expedient. And to this,
Peterson is opposed. He arrives at this conclusion based on a lengthy analysis of
the works of Dostoevsky, Nietzsche, The Bible, mass shootings, and more. There
may be no inherent meaning for your existence, but you can make your own.
Rule #8 Tell the
truth, or at least, don't lie:
Picture this You are a medical student, and you walk into a
hospital with your instructor, along with eight other students. You are here on
an expedition. You pass the mental health ward. And, as you do, a schizophrenic
patient approaches. In a childlike manner, she asks you, "Why are you all
standing here?" "What are you doing?" "Can I come along
with you?" So what do you say? Nobody wanted to say anything that may have
come across as a rejection to a potentially volatile and already hurt patient. But
nobody wanted to say yes either. Peterson faced this exact scenario, and he
ended up telling the truth. He said that we're new students training to be
psychologists, and she couldn't join for that reason. She looked hurt, but only
for a moment. She understood and moved on. That's not to say that all
situations in life will pan out like this, but the point is that dishonesty will
always come back to bite you. So tell the truth, or at least, don't lie.
Rule #9 Assume that the
person you are listening to might know something you don't:
You'd be surprised what you can learn by shutting up and
truly listening. Sometimes you can gain knowledge by just staying quiet and
listening to the person in front of you as there will be some of more that od
knowledge that will be unknown to you.
Rule #10 Be precise in your speech:
You wake up in pain. You might be dying slowly of a horrible
disease. You refuse to tell your doctor about your pain, so what you have is
unknowing. You could have a stroke, heart disease, and lung cancer all at the
same time. Who knows? But, if you talk to your doctor, all those terrible possible
diseases will dissipate, likely into one disease or perhaps even nothing. But
you'd only know this if you were precise in your speech, which is telling your
doctor in this case. For me, this lesson is most effectively applied by writing
your thoughts on paper, especially when it's about something that is bothering
you, such as an issue in your intimate relationship.
Rule #11 Do not
bother children when they are skateboarding:
I believe the following quote sums up this rule perfectly. When
the boys were spinning donuts, they were also testing the limits of their cars,
their ability as drivers, and their capacity for control in an out-of-control
situation. When they told off the teachers, they were pushing against authority
to see if there was any real authority there, the kind that could be relied on
in principle in a crisis. When they quit school, they went to work as rig
roughnecks, when it was forty bloody degrees below zero. It wasn't weakness that
propelled so many out of the classroom, where a better future arguably
awaited." "It was strength."
Rule #12 Pet a cat when
you encounter one on the street:
Ginger is a cat that lives across the street from Peterson.
Ginger waltzes across the road to play with Peterson's dog, Sikko. Peterson
pats Ginger. Now it's moments like these that give the bad days a little extra
light. Small opportunities like this may confront you from time to time, but
only if you pay careful attention. Don't be afraid to go out of your own way and
indulge in these pockets of light to give yourself a break from the absurdity
of existence.
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