Mark Manson - The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A F*ck [ By the Author of Everything id F*cked ]

The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A F*ck

 

About The Author:

Mark Manson (born March 9, 1984) is an American self-help author and blogger. As of 2019 he had authored three books, two of which, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck, and Everything Is Fucked: A Book about Hope, were The New York Times bestsellers. Manson started his first blog about dating advice in 2008.

 

In 2010, he started a new blog called Post Masculine (now defunct) which provided general life advice for men. Manson moved his blog to markmanson.net in 2013.

 

In 2015, Manson published a blog article "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck", which would form the basis of his second book by the same name.

 

Summary Of The Book:

The book says that key to living a good life is not giving a fuck about other things but you should give a fuck about only things that matters and will enhance your personal values. This book helps us to visualize success and think about the type of person you want to become. You have been taught that meaning of good life is having a nicer job or a better car or a prettier wife, but the key to a good life is not giving a fuck about more; it’s giving a fuck about less, giving a fuck about only what is true and immediate and important. There are only so many things we can give a f**k about so we need to figure out which ones really matter, Manson makes clear. While money is nice, caring about what you do with your life is better, because true wealth is about experience. A much-needed grab-you-by-the-shoulders-and-look-you-in-the-eye moment of real-talk, filled with entertaining stories and profane, ruthless humor, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is a refreshing slap for a generation to help them lead contented, grounded lives.

 

“You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life.” -Albert Camus

 

The desire of more positive experience leads to more negative experience but paradoxically the acceptance of negative experience is itself a positive experience. As the “Backward Law” (given by Philosopher Alan watts) states that the more you crave for feeling better all the time, the less you become, as pursuing something only reinforces the fact that you lack it in first place. As stated in this book, you should not hope for a life without problem, hope for a life with good problems. Problems in your life never stops they get exchanged or upgraded, the real happiness comes from problems you enjoy having and solving.  Everything in your life comes from an inherent sacrifice- whatever makes you feel good today may be the reason for your depression tomorrow. It is our struggles that determine our success. This success is achieved by self-esteem but self-esteem us usually measured by how positively you feel about yourself. But a true and genuine measurement of self-esteem will be how you are felling about negative aspects of yourself. The true measurement of self-worth is not how a person feels about her positive experiences, but rather how they feel about their negative experiences. Many people are afraid to accept mediocrity because they believe if they accept it they will never achieve anything and never improve.

Some people become exceptional at something not because they believe they are exceptional, they become amazing because they are obsessed with improvements. As said in book self-awareness is like an Onion, first layer is simple understanding of one’s emotion, second layer is to ask why we are felling those emotions and after asking this you will find the root cause of emotion and we can ideally do something to solve it and the last layer is our personal values. Values underlie everything we are and what we do. Our values determine the metrics by which we measure ourselves and everyone surrounding us. Take a moment and ask you self what if bugging you and second question will be why it bugs you, after performing this you may have the solution.

          When the standard of success becomes merely acting—when any result is regarded as progress and important, when inspiration is seen as a reward rather than a prerequisite—we propel ourselves ahead. We feel free to fail, and that failure moves us forward.

 

Ultimately, the only way to achieve meaning and a sense of importance in one’s life is through a rejection of alternatives, a narrowing of freedom, a choice of commitment to one place, one belief, or (gulp) one person.

 

We all must give a f*ck about something, in order to value something. And to value something, we must reject what is not that something.

 

The desire to avoid rejection at all costs, to avoid confrontation and conflict, the desire to attempt to accept everything equally and to make everything cohere and harmonize, is a deep and subtle form of entitlement.      

  

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